Aries: How do you feel about your insanely intense need for a cool Halloween costume? If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking!

Taurus: School is tough, but you are tougher. Stick it out, you can do it!

Gemini: Listen, there are only so many signs from the universe. I’m sure next month will be different.

Cancer: It seems like a good idea to go to Topper Thrift once it opens. Hopefully that’ll be this month.

Leo: If you’re late to class, you may pay the price! Please make sure your alarms are on.

Virgo: Bake some pumpkin cookies! Destress and eat something tasty. Just don’t burn down your communal oven.

Libra: Something calls for you…like a cup of something fall-flavored from Starbucks.

Scorpio: Woohoo! The start of your season is at the end of the month! Celebrate responsibly.

Sagittarius: I recommend trying something new this month, like a couple’s costume contest 😉

Capricorn: Try the Zen Den. That should help solve any perfectionist problems you may have discovered this month.

Aquarius: Much like you, the leaves are detached this month. Jump in them for some extra, whimsical fun.

Pisces: You ought to join Aquarius in the leaf-jumping. You’re just the whimsy-filled dreamer they need.

*These horoscopes are entirely satirical and should not be taken as legitimate advice. Like the title of this section says, this is just for fun.